Saturday, November 16, 2013

Gender, Gender Identity, and Sexual Orientation

 I have a cousin who as a child we knew he was gay. He always wanted to play school and things girls like to do. He was such a kind and gentle kid. The kids would always tease him and I would feel very sorry for him and I was afraid to take up for him, for fear that they would not play with me. As a child your instincts are always to belong to a group so, whatever the group wanted so did you. Growing up he started to dress like a girl so, he was always called sissy or fag. But he always held his up high and it seemed not to deter him for choosing to live the way he wanted to live.

 He was very resilient and it seemed not to bother him but, I know it did. However, many so called heterosexuals believe that they are not prejudice, and will say statements like have a gay friend. If that person is your friend why do you have to create a label for them? My cousin stated to me once that the fear he has of being gay is losing friends and families, or even being physically assaulted.
                       
 I can only imagine what a child goes through expressing fears to your parents that you may be homosexual and your parents hide their anxieties by reassuring you that it will go away, and that it is just a phrase. Imagine what it is like to pretend to be someone you’re not, to live a lie, to deceive yourself and your parents. They fear losing friends and families, being socially ostracized, and even physically assaulted. Let’s all help children to respect themselves by showing respect for them regardless of who they are.  

If anyone wants to listen to  to this song go to: youtube and chose, MackleMore & Ryan Lewis featuring Mary Lambert. This profound song is one that everyone should listen to about sexual orientations of indiviuals. We should all just listen and get some idea of what gay individuals go through in this country.

2 comments:

  1. Kathleen,
    Great posting. I cannot imagine the pain individual experiences being a lesbian or gay. We all should have the freedom, privilege and the opportunity to decide on what we want to be in life. Whatever we choose to do is no one else’s business. I hope your relative is at peace, and I hope those that form any act of discrimination against him will realize that he is just as important as they are. Also, I am glad he had the strength and courage to talk about his sexual orientation with others. Thanks for the information, I will check out the song on you tube and chose, Mackle More & Ryan Lewis featuring Mary Lambert.
    Ida!!

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  2. Hi Kathleen,
    First, I'm glad to see we are together in a group and I agree with a statement you made. You said, "... showing respect for them regardless of who they are." All people need to be loved, need to be heard, and need basic needs and this is part of respect and dignity. I remember Dr. T on a radio station (89.7) here in Miami, he said we need to focus on loving others and looking at ourselves if we want to find issues to look at; I agree, we have so much we can improve on in our own lives. I always pray, "Search me Lord, and know me, if there be any wicked way within ME, show me," (Bible, Psalms). Thanks for sharing your personal experience.
    Kimberly

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